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I get it. You’re feeling a little low and you need a little pick me up.
As humans, we can relate to this sentiment because we’ve all been through low moments at some point in our lives.
Okay, let’s face it. At times, things just don’t go as planned and we sometimes beat ourselves up for it. But no matter the challenge or how we feel, there’s always going to be this little gleam of hope inside of you — telling you — never to give up because you gon’ be alright (cue in Kendrick Lamar please, always, and thank you).
There will be people in your life that will tell you to never quit when the going gets tough. Other people will even advise you to never quit in life because you’re a strong person and your life and other people depend on it.
Now, those are all valid points.
But more than anything, I think it’s very important to never quit on yourself, because all of those points begin with you, first.
Over the past years, I’ve learned that some people are quick to give you advice but cannot take their own advice. Unfortunately, some people are led to do more of the talking than the actual walking. This is why we as individual bodies – you and I – have the power to never quit on our own selves (if we choose to).
Now don’t get me wrong, there are things in life that you should quit because they can be toxic, harmful or even block you from reaching your fullest potential. Nevertheless, we are not talking about that right now lol.
In this post, we’re going to focus on 8 things to quit in the year flippin’ 2020.
Every year, I always come across these inspirational posts about things to quit in *insert any year here* and it’s always the same. Still, a friendly reminder of these posts is necessary if we want to see personal growth in our lives.
*I am not a doctor, life coach, or healthcare professional. My blog posts are just my opinions and the results of things that either worked for me or didn’t. I am just passionate about sharing my experiences and providing tips on self-care and personal development.
1. Trying To Please Everyone
Got one word for you. Impossible. You might as well throw in the towel right now on that one. It sucks that many of us — depending on how we see the world — are programmed to please or care about what others think.
For years, I’ve struggled with trying to please everyone at my school or in my church. No matter how many times I tried to fit in or do everything “right”, it never worked. It always was never enough and I was gradually losing myself.
Trying to please everyone is a ridiculous challenge and is overrated anyway. It’s best to just focus your energy on things that can mold you, help you, push you for the better and bring you genuine happiness.
2. Fearing Change
I’m not gonna lie, change is a very scary thing — especially if you have to go it alone.
In the presidential speech from Franklin D. Roosevelt, he stated that — the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. When he told this to the masses, he was informing them of how fear just makes things worse. The best thing to remember about fear is that it’s just an illusion. When you calm down and strip away the “fear”, all that remains is the actual courage and confidence to do anything.
As for change, this is inevitable — meaning you can’t get away from it. All you can do is accept that change is going to happen whether you like it or not.
I find that the best way to accept change is to go with the flow and adapt to whatever situation you’re dealt with. If you cannot adapt, figure out how you can make the situation/circumstances work for you.
This quote from B.K.S. Iyengar is spot on about change — change is not something we should fear. Rather, it is something we should welcome. For without change, nothing in this world would ever grow or blossom and no one in this world would ever move forward to become the person they’re meant to be.
3. Living in the Past
Not anymore. At least for me anyway. The past is out of our hands and out of our control.
Unless you got a time machine, I don’t wanna hear about what you shoulda, coulda, woulda done back then. It’s a new day and we have to keep moving forward.
Just like Philippians 3:14 states — I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Wherever you may find yourself in life, you have to keep pressing on towards your life goals.
We are put on this earth for a reason. Whether it’s to find our purpose in life or discover the talents you have, you decide. You cannot do any of this if you’re busy living in the past.
The past is only commendable for good memories, life lessons, and improving upon your past mistakes. Always remember to not dwell in the past because it will only hold you back from reaching what is meant for you in the future or present.
Ugh. The absolute thief of your peace of mind.
I’m still struggling with this myself and am trying to figure out how to calm it down. Overthinking brings about anxiety, depression, creates non-existent issues and gets you worked up for nothing.
I’ve noticed that when it gets really quiet, this is when my overthinking works overtime. Lately, I find that a few breathing exercises help, as well as listening to music or hearing other people talk fills the quiet spaces.
Genereux Philip stated that — Overthinking is parasitic. It’s viral. It’s deadly, even. Letting yourself fall victim to overthinking doesn’t just kill your happiness, it destroys who you are. The mind is a beautiful and complex thing, and the only person who can hurt it is yourself.
5. Being Afraid To Be Different
This part really grinds my gears because unless you’re a twin, we all are born different anyway. Even twins are not exactly, exactly alike.
It’s exhausting trying to fit in and hide away who you really are. Trust me, I know. If you’re afraid to be different because you’re scared of what other people might say, guess what: people are going to talk anyway regardless of if you’re different or not.
If you’re afraid because it scares you to be different, think about being a carbon copy of everyone else for the rest of your life. That thought should scare you even more.
Whatever your fear is, just know that there is only one you and no one can be that. I know this is cheesy but please just beYOUtiful because only you can do that flawlessly.
6. Sacrificing Your Happiness For Others
In a way, this kind of goes hand in hand with trying to please everyone. In both instances, the only person that suffers is…you.
Giving your energy up to other people to use is a very dangerous thing. Although people are gracious for it, there are others that fully take advantage of that energy, and when they use it all up, you don’t have any of it left for yourself. Be wary of surrounding yourself with people like this. You will know them by the energy they don’t give back for you to also fill up your tank.
Your energy. your mind. your happiness. needs to be protected at all times. Make sure to use it wisely or you will lose it and even yourself.
7. Thinking You’re Not Good Enough
You are. Let’s stop right there. You are enough. Do not fall for those negative voices in your head. They are liars. Just like DJ Khalid says we do not listen to the theys.
Theys are good at tearing you down. Theys are good at breaking the little confidence that you have left. Theys are good at being destructive.
Well, don’t forget that you’re good too. You’re good at not listening to the theys — whether they’re in your head or in the physical form. Remember that you have the power to muster up the courage and confidence to do anything. This includes positive thinking, building up your self-esteem, dressing better, and putting yourself first.
8. Thinking You Have No Purpose
This type of thinking is also very dangerous. Please do not think like this especially if you are feeling down. I believe that every person placed on this earth has a purpose. You just have to find it.
Firstly, it’s a good idea to figure out what you’re actually good at. Then you can use the good to help other people and better yourself. Moreover, finding your purpose does not happen overnight and can take a really long time, maybe even years.
You are definitely not alone in this.
Even though I have a lot of talents, I’m still in the process of figuring out my purpose in this world and when I find it, I will strive in it as I should. I know that vision boards can also help in visually seeing your purpose and goals come alive.
In conclusion, never give up on yourself, your purpose in life, school, work or wherever else you find purpose in this world.
In a way, writing this post has been very therapeutic for me and I hope it served its’ purpose for you too.
What types of things are you struggling with quitting right now? What’s holding you back from reaching your full potential? Let’s talk about it in the comments below.